Video clips

Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor.

Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints by QANTAS pilots and the corrective action recorded by mechanics.

By the way, Qantas is the only major airline that has never had an accident.

(P stands for the Problem the pilots entered in the log, and S stands for the Corrective Action taken by the mechanics.)

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
S: Autoland not installed on this aircraft.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on backorder.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed

P: Suspected crack in windscreen.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.